Want Anything, Asuka?
by The Forth Man
Summary: One-Shot. Shinji's crush on Asuka. An opportunity for his dream to become a reality.
1. Want Anything, Asuka?: Shinji's POV

Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion  
  
Want Anything, Asuka?  
  
==========  
  
"Want anything, Asuka?" I asked, just like I do every morning.  
  
"Shinji-kun." She whispered in her most seductive voice. "I WANT YOU!"  
  
I blink, once or twice. Did I hear her right? Her following actions eliminated my doubts. "Mmmph!!" I think I manage to let out as Asuka planted her lips onto mine; her tongue exploring the roof of my mouth.  
  
That's about the time that my senses finally hit home. Oh my God. She wanted me, and by the looks of her aggressiveness, holy shit, she wanted me badly! The redheaded goddess that I've adored for so long was engaging in sexual activities with me! Before I knew it, she was ripping my clothes off as if they were made of flimsy paper. To my surprise, my hands were also busy as they explored the insides of her T-shirt. After a few seconds of groping, we found ourselves completely lacking of clothes. I began to thrust myself inside her, forcing slight moans to escape her lips.  
  
"Nuugh." I grunt as I began to reach my climax. Finally, I couldn't hold it in anymore. I screamed as I released the thick fluid from my manhood.  
  
That was, of course, when my eyes opened for real.  
  
----------  
  
"Ugh." I yawned as I got up from my bed. Another wet dream, how embarrassing.  
  
No, this was not my first, not by far. To tell you the truth, ever since I've developed feelings for my roommate, Asuka Langley Soryu, I've had a wet dream about once every two weeks, all of which she was the basis of. So what if I can't get her out of my mind? If you had lived with her for as long as I have, you wouldn't be able to stop thinking about her either. Especially since she beats it into you if you don't give her the attention she requires.  
  
Speaking of which, I should make breakfast soon if I am to avoid the wrath of an unfed redhead. The sun was already up, which means I should hurry before the others wake. I set a beer on the table, knowing that Misato would need one to get her day started. As for breakfast, that would require a bit more time setting.  
  
I had thought about making bacon, but last time I did, Asuka complained that there was too much fat on the bacon sides. So I would have to trim the fats off the bacon, just enough to make it bearable yet leaving the flavor in at the same time. Doing just that would require time that I didn't have. So instead I fried some eggs along with the few seasonings that Asuka liked. I placed a few slices of cheese in the eggs to create an omelet. Asuka likes those.  
  
Asuka likes this. Asuka likes that. Asuka, Asuka, Asuka. I know I'm whipped, but that doesn't matter. What disgusts me though is that I don't care about being whipped. In fact, I'm comfortable with it. But I think about it now and then and I realize that I'm a sick person. Being slaved to a girl that slaps me around just to be near her, and not giving a damn about it.  
  
Crap, I realize that I've wasted too much time as I hear Asuka's door sliding open. Just a matter of time now before—  
  
"Ohayo, Shinji."  
  
There it is. The reason for me to get up every morning.  
  
"Ohayo." I reply just as she steps out of the bathroom. "Want anything, Asuka?" My daily morning question.  
  
"Breakfast, of course." She grumbles. Judging by her droopy eyes, she didn't sleep well.  
  
"Omelets sound good?" I ask. Please say yes.  
  
"Sure." She mutters after rubbing her eyes a bit. There I go again, gazing into her ocean blue eyes. So beautiful, even after a sleepless night. It takes me a while to snap back into reality. I hurry to the stove to prepare the omelet dish.  
  
"Want anything else?" I ask.  
  
"I want you."  
  
I blink as my cheeks glow red. Okay, this time I know I'm awake. "Huh?"  
  
"What, are you stupid AND deaf now?" She snaps at me. "I said I wanted some tea."  
  
Alright, maybe I wasn't as awake as I thought I was. I didn't exactly get a long good night's sleep either. It was mainly Misato's fault. She had decided to get drunk in a bar and stay that way until 2 o'clock in the morning. Asuka and I were asleep at that time only to be woken up by a call from Misato requesting that we drag her home. Of course, when we got to the bar, we couldn't get in due to being underage, so Asuka had to find a way to "distract" the doorman while I sneaked in a dragged Misato out. By the time we got home, it was almost 4 o'clock.  
  
Stupid "distraction" of Asuka's was probably the cause of my goddamn dream.  
  
"Here's your tea." I say as I placed the cup in front of her. "No sleep, eh?" A desperate attempt at a conversation.  
  
"Stupid Misato." Asuka mumbles as she sips her tea. "What the hell is she thinking, making us wake up in the middle of the night to drag her drunken ass home?"  
  
"Heh." I chuckle. "Yeah, well when Misato's drunk, you know she doesn't do much thinking." A sad attempt at a joke that Asuka pays no attention to. "Yesterday was a school night too."  
  
"Which is why you need to hurry up." Asuka says as she gets up from her finished breakfast. Holy shit, that was fast. I guess there is some merit to the reason why she always says I'm slow. "If I'm late one more time because of you, you're really going to regret it, Baka-Shinji." She emphasizes her threat with a fist.  
  
Why she demands that we walk to school together is beyond me, especially since she's always complaining that I'm too slow. It's not that I don't like walking with Asuka, I greatly enjoy spending time with her. It's just that when she's willing to spend time walking to school with me, it raises this small hope inside me that maybe, just maybe, she cares for me too.  
  
But that's not possible, is it?  
  
----------  
  
School. Every time I think that the sensei is about to run out of material on the second impact, he manages to bring up something completely new yet still incredibly boring to tell us about. Not that I spend class time actually listening to him. No, my attention is focused to another person in the classroom. Guess who.  
  
That's right: Asuka.  
  
I'm not a peeping hentai or anything. But when you have a sensei that drones on and on about something that I'm sure the students couldn't care less about, your eyes tend to search around for something more interesting to focus on. Asuka was definitely more interesting than the old man. Sometimes she sleeps in class due to her short attention span, and she just looks so damn peaceful. I don't know how long I've been starting at her, but I don't think I can ever get bored of doing so.  
  
Suddenly, she shifts her head towards my direction, and our eyes meet. I must say that her eyes are by far the most fascinating aspect of her goddess-like face. It takes me a second to realize that she's going to kick my ass if she realizes that I'm staring at her. I quickly shift my eyes to someplace else and turn my head as if I was merely looking around the room to relieve my boredom. Good old reliable Fake Coincidence Head-Shift Maneuver.  
  
I don't believe it really works, but it's a lot better than just letting Asuka know that I've been staring at her for the entire class period. However, that time I was lucky enough not to get caught. As I take a small glance at Asuka I realize that she too was also bored and merely looking around the classroom.  
  
After a few more minutes of boredom, my laptop receives a message.  
  
"You bored too?" My laptop displays. I look at around the room as my eyes fall on Asuka. She was indeed typing on her keyboard, sending additional messages to me.  
  
"Well? Reply already, Baka-Shinji." She types.  
  
"I'm surprised that you're not asleep yet." I reply. That's the way to go, start the conversation with a light-mood sentence.  
  
"I might as well be. I'm not learning anything anyways." She says. "But if I go to sleep, then I become vulnerable to you or your hentai stooges staring at my glorious body without the fear of me beating the crap out of you guys." Funny how close that came to what I actually do in class.  
  
I'm sure my cheeks are somewhat red by now. "I'm not a hentai. And who in their right mind would risk getting beaten to death by you anyways?" I would.  
  
"I do instill fear, don't I? :-) "  
  
"Heh. To Kensuke, maybe." I type. "Toji, however, only obeys Hikari." Yes, I know how Toji feels about Hikari. I am not so dense as to not seeing the obvious feelings they share for each other. Hell, the only person that doesn't see it is probably Toji and Hikari themselves, and maybe Kensuke.  
  
"They have it in for each other so badly and they don't see it. It's kind of sad, isn't it?"  
  
See? Everyone knows. "One of them should make the first move. I bet that's exactly what both of them are hoping and waiting for the other to do. I just don't see the point in not making a move, there's no harm in doing so." I'm such a hypocrite. Hoping and waiting is exactly what I've been doing all along with Asuka.  
  
"I completely agree." A message enters coming from an unknown source. "I thought you two might have been talking to each other. You should take your own advice, Shinji."  
  
There was only one hacker in the whole class. "Kensuke?" I type, hoping to deter the subject from me taking my own advice.  
  
"Baka!" Asuka messages. "How dare you enter our conversation you stooge!"  
  
"He's not the only one!" messages another eavesdropper. It was obviously Toji; no one else had any interest in my conversations with Asuka. "So what have you two newlyweds been plotting eh?" The damn newlyweds comment again.  
  
That pretty much ended my "private" conversation with Asuka. The rest of the messages consisted of Toji and Kensuke making more offending jokes on Asuka and me while Asuka mainly made threats to castrate my two best friends. Sometimes I wish that they would not interrupt my conversations, especially since they are so rare with Asuka. I really don't understand what kind of grudge they have against her. But then again, they don't live with her. If only they knew Asuka as well as I did, then they would see what a great person she is.  
  
---------  
  
"You're drunk." I point out. I guess it was okay for Asuka to be drinking since it was New Years, but I think that she might have went too far.  
  
"No I'm not." She defends right before she went into a giggling fit. "You're the one that's drunk." I haven't even touched the sake.  
  
I don't drink, not even on New Years. After months of seeing Misato drunk nearly every morning, I don't think I'll ever touch alcohol in my life. Speaking of Misato, she's spending her New Years at a party that was held at Kaji's apartment. Asuka desperately begged Misato to let her go to Kaji's New Years party, but Misato pointed out that the party was strictly for adults only. Before leaving, Misato left us a large bottle of sake, saying that it was okay to drink on this occasion, partially trying to tempt me to drink. Then she left me and Asuka alone.  
  
Make that me and a very drunk Asuka alone.  
  
I know what you're thinking; it's the same thing my hormones are telling me right now: "Go for it, Shinji. There isn't a more perfect time and place to make your move. Come on, Shinji. Look at her, she's so drunk she's practically asking for it."  
  
Well, at least the second part of that was true. Asuka was drunk off her ass, even more so than Misato's usual drunkenness.  
  
"Asuka." I say as I kneel down to her level, praying that I would be able to summon enough guts to just go for it.  
  
"Yes?" she asks, still giggling.  
  
"I…" I begin to stammer. "I-I… uhh… that is… I…"  
  
"What?" Asuka asks as she sticks her face closer to mine. She holds an angelic smile below her dazzling eyes. My god, her lips are so close. Damn it, just say it.  
  
"I-I-I…" Something blanks out in my stomach as I turn my blush-red face around and grab the sake bottle. "I really think you should stop drinking!" Stupid, cowardly Shinji. I'm going to kick myself in the nuts so bad after this.  
  
"Hmph." She scoffs. "You're no fun at all." I'd have to concur.  
  
Her mouth forms into a soft grin as she slowly crawls towards me. My breathing stops as I see her approaching me. I can swear that my heart skipped a beat or two. As she crawls closer, I feel my body move backwards, my temperature still rising. I stumbling on something and fall on my back. Holy shit, she's on top of me right now, her hair is drooping right on my face as we stare at each other.  
  
Don't think, Shinji. Don't even think about it. There's plenty of stuff to think about other than this. Like, think about how Misato's doing right now. Or think about your sync-ratio and how to improve them. Or think  
  
Sex.  
  
Damn it, stupid hormones. Stupid little-Shinji can't think about anything else but the position that I'm stuck in right now. Stupid little-Shinji is getting too exited right now.  
  
"Do you care about me, Shinji?" Asuka asks. The question hits me like a hit-and-run truck. "Do you like me?"  
  
I nod. I'm in no position to do anything else, seeing as how she's pinning me down at the wrists.  
  
"Say it." Asuka softly demands. "Tell me in words."  
  
I gulp, knowing it couldn't be avoided anymore. "I like you Asuka, more than you can imagine. I've always cared about you; I liked you ever since we first met. That's the truth."  
  
A smile grew on Asuka's face. A genuine smile. "I like you too." She said with a bit of drunkenness. "I mean, I really REALLY like you!"  
  
She likes me? My God, Asuka likes me! "You really do?" I manage to ask.  
  
"Yes, I do." She admits. "You're mine, okay? You'll always be my Baka-Shinji forevers and evers and evers. You'd never leave me would you?"  
  
"Of course not." I answer. Words were just spewing out of my mouth now. "I'll never leave you. I'll stay with you forever."  
  
"Promise me." She says, her eyes growing a bit teary.  
  
"I promise that I'll never leave you." I promise. "No matter what happens, I'll always be by your side."  
  
"Then kiss me." She whispers as her face leans towards mine.  
  
Do it, I tell myself. She's telling you to do it. Just press your lips onto "Mmph!"  
  
Oh my God. She's kissing me, and I'm wide awake! No, I'm sure this isn't a dream. 100% sure. Dear Kami-sama she really does want me! I allow myself to enjoy to moment. This once in a million lifetimes drunken moment. I start to kiss her back, it takes me awhile but I finally return the passion she's giving me. The kiss seemed to last for hours in my mind; time seemed to have dropped, leaving my attached to Asuka's forever. It was heaven.  
  
It takes me a while to realize that Asuka had fallen asleep.  
  
Heh, what a moment. I slowly slide my drunken roommate off of me. I didn't want to lift her up and place her in her bed, in fear of what she'd do if she woke up when I'm still in her room, so I place a pillow under her head and cover her body with a blanket. It was getting pretty late, and I feel pretty tired. I head off to my bedroom, leaving Asuka to sleep peacefully in the living room.  
  
She likes me. I'll be lucky if I get a wink of sleep tonight.  
  
----------  
  
It's early. I should wake up and make breakfast before the others awaken. I get up and quickly throw a few ingredients together for a quick breakfast as I start to reminisce about what happened on New Years day. Then I start to recall what happened between me and Asuka.  
  
She likes me.  
  
I'm glad that nobody's looking at me right now because I probably have the stupidest grin stuck on my face. She admitted that she likes me.   
  
Then something that never occurred to me before struck my mind. What would happen if we became a couple? How long would we last together? There might be a chance that she would get bored of me or something, and leave me for someone else. After all, I'm just Baka-Shinji.  
  
I guess I wouldn't know the answer to those questions if I didn't make the first move. Yes, today is the day when Shinji Ikari shall ask to have the honor of becoming Asuka Langley Soryu's boyfriend. I walk over to the living room, wondering if Asuka was still sleeping on the floor. I would have to wake her up, and ask what was to become of us.  
  
To my surprise, Asuka was already awake, sitting on the living room couch with her head buried underneath her hands.  
  
"Ohayo." I say, not knowing how else to greet her.  
  
"Ohayo." She casually replies, clutching her head tighter.  
  
"Are you feeling okay?" I ask. Perhaps it was not the best time to bring up the boyfriend question.  
  
"Does it look like I'm okay, Baka-Shinji?" Asuka snaps. "I got a headache so big it feels like I'm turning into a stooge!"  
  
That wasn't surprising. "Well, you did drink nearly a full bottle of Misato's sake last night. You're probably getting a hangover." I remind her.  
  
"Is that what I did last night?" She asks.  
  
Huh? What did she mean? "Of course you did. The bottle didn't just empty itself."  
  
"I don't remember." She says with a hint of frustration. "I don't remember anything that happened last night."  
  
"…" I couldn't say anything. I was speechless.  
  
She didn't remember. My heart felt like it was slashed in two. The words she said to me, the kiss we shared, the promise, she didn't remember any of it. Tears began to form, slightly blurring my vision. If I wasn't so weak, I would have then and there committed suicide.  
  
"I didn't do anything stupid, did I?" Asuka asks. "Nothing happened right?"  
  
I wipe my tears away and showed a smile. "No, Asuka. Nothing happened." I lied.  
  
"Good." She says, returning my smile. "For your sake I hope nothing hentai happened yesterday. If I find out you did something hentai to me, you're going to fear even being in the same room as me." I nod, acknowledging her threat.  
  
I actually felt relieved now. The truth is that I didn't have to be Asuka's boyfriend to be close to her. We were already close to each other all along, and we were both comfortable with it. We both like each other, so we can stay this way forever. Just like I promised, I'll never leave her. I'll be by her side for all eternity.  
  
I start to walk towards the kitchen, knowing that Asuka would probably like some ice for her headache. "Breakfast is almost ready." I inform her. "Want anything, Asuka?"  
  
"Breakfast, of course." She replies. All is right with the world.  
  
THE END  
  
==========  
  
Backstage Bonus: My anger is my pain  
  
TheForthMan: Thanks for spending your time in this fanfic, Asuka.  
  
Asuka: No problem, I needed some work to do while waiting for Gainax's next Evangelion project anyways.  
  
Rei: Do you know if they're even going to have a next Evangelion project?  
  
TheForthMan: You mean you guys haven't heard?  
  
Asuka/Rei: Heard what?  
  
TheForthMan: Gainax is retelling the Evangelion series in a movie form in America.  
  
Asuka: Cool, I wonder how much we're getting paid for this.  
  
Rei: Interesting, why haven't we been sent the scripts yet?  
  
TheForthMan (sweating now): Oh… umm… because… there's something you guys should know…  
  
Asuka/Rei: Yes?  
  
TheForthMan (sweating more): I don't know how to tell you guys this…  
  
Asuka/Rei: What?  
  
TheForthMan: And you guys need to know the most important thing is to stay calm, no matter what…  
  
Asuka/Rei: What do you mean?  
  
TheForthMan: And you guys might even find this a little funny…  
  
Asuka/Rei: Go on.  
  
TheForthMan: They haven't sent you scripts because it's a live-action Evangelion movie and they're using live actors to play you guys.  
  
Asuka: ……  
  
Rei: ……  
  
TheForthMan (seriously sweating now): ……  
  
Asuka/Rei (breaking out into uncontrollable laughter): hehehehaHAHAHAHAHAH!!!  
  
TheForthMan (a bit relieved): See? Heh, pretty funny eh? Heh heh, live actors. What were they thinking eh?  
  
Asuka/Rei (Still laughing uncontrollably): HAHAHA live action? What are they on? Crack? HAHAHAHA!!!  
  
TheForthMan (joining the laughter): HAHAHA yeah! It gets better too! They changed Rei's name to Ray spelled R-A-Y! HAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Asuka (laughing even harder now): HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Rei (laughing toned down to a mere chuckle): HAHaheh heh…  
  
TheForthMan: HAHAHA!!! And her hair isn't even blue, it's black! HAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Asuka (laughing as hard as possible): HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Rei (stops laughing): ……  
  
TheForthMan (still laughing hard): HAHAHA that's not all! It gets funnier! HAHA, Asuka's name gets changed to Kate Rose! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Asuka (suddenly stops): ……  
  
Rei: ……  
  
TheForthMan (slowly noticing he's the only one laughing): HAHAHAhaheh heh heh… can you believe it? Blue-haired Ray? Kate Rose? Heh heh heh…  
  
Asuka (eyes dimming): ……  
  
TheForthMan (starting to sweat again): Funny huh? The whole thing takes place in New York too. Isn't that unbelievable? …Isn't it?  
  
Asuka (smiling slightly): Heh heh.  
  
Rei (matching Asuka's smile): Heh heh.  
  
Asuka/Rei (starts laughing again): Hahahahahaha!!!  
  
TheForthMan (insecurely joining the laughter): Heh. Funny, huh? Hahahahahah!!!  
  
Asuka/Rei (starts forming fists while still laughing): HAHAHAHAHAHA WE'RE GOING TO KILL YOU HAHAHAHA!!!  
  
TheForthMan (turning his laugh into a sob): HAHAHA I KNOW… heh heh… waaaahhhh!!!  
  
(A bunch of CRACK and SMASH noises can be heard from the backstage)  
  
----------  
  
(After two hours, the beating still continues)  
  
Shinji (sighing): That's like the hundredth author they've beaten up in fanfiction.net.  
  
Toji: Two hours with this one… isn't that a little excessive?  
  
Shinji (shaking his head): When will these authors learn to not piss off Asuka and Rei? 


	2. Breakfast, Of Course: Asuka's POV

Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion  
  
Breakfast, of course – Asuka's POV  
  
==========  
  
4:30 AM, that's what the clock says.  
  
Stupid Misato and her stupid drinking problem. How the hell can she get drunken 2 o'clock in the morning, completely forgetting about me and Baka-Shinji, and still call herself our guardian? But that's not even the worst part. The baka and I had to drag Misato's drunken ass back to the apartment. By that time it was already 4 o'clock, which meant that school would start in a few hours. Not a lot of sleep tonight for me.  
  
The baka hurried off to sleep immediately after we put Misato to bed, he's probably trying to get as much sleep as possible before school starts. I should go back to bed now, but something inside me is telling me to stay here, in Shinji's room.  
  
Yeah.  
  
I'll just stay here for just a little longer, watching the baka sleep. My invincible Baka-Shinji.  
  
----------  
  
"Ohayo, Shinji." I say as I walk past him to the bathroom. That's probably the nicest thing I'm going to say all morning.  
  
I don't know why, but whenever I'm talking to Shinji, or even get near him for that matter, I always feel like I have to mask my affection with insults and violence. It's just that I've always been this way to the baka, and it's hard for me to change. So no matter how hard I try to be nice to Shinji, I always take the easy route and repel him. Sick isn't it? I'm always being a bitch to probably the only one in this world who accepts me for who I really am. I'm pathetic.  
  
But it'll be different today. I know this sounds silly, but today I'm going to work on being nice to him. After all, change doesn't happen if you just wait for it.  
  
"Ohayo." He replies with a smile. "Want anything, Asuka?" It's beyond me why he has to ask me that every damn morning.  
  
"Breakfast, of course." I answer like I do every day. I really hope that if Shinji made bacon this morning and that he would trim off the fat the way I requested it, just leaving a tolerable amount in to keep the flavor.  
  
"Omelets sound good?" He asks. I really wanted bacon, but I tell myself to just be nice to the baka. He makes good breakfasts, after all.  
  
"Sure." I say as I rub my eyes. I definitely did not get enough sleep.  
  
"Want anything else?" He asks. Why does he always try to please everyone? He's practically always asking if he could do anything to brighten up our lives in any way. What about his own needs and wants? He never seems to request anything for himself. It makes him so… desirable.  
  
"Tea." I say. I wonder what he would have done if I shouted out that I wanted him, that he's the only thing I want right now.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"What are you, stupid AND deaf now?" I roar at him. "I said I wanted some tea."  
  
I really don't know why I'm shouting. I'm really trying to stop. Why do I do that? Why do I push away those that I care for most? I would blame it on my sleep deprivation, but I know better. It's just me. I wonder now if I'm ever going to change.  
  
"Here's your tea." He says as he serves me my breakfast. I begin to wonder how long it will take me to change, or if I would ever stop yelling at him or beating him. How long will he put up with me if I don't change? Fear strikes my heart at the thought that Shinji would leave me.  
  
Please stay with me, Shinji. Just put up with me for a little longer. Please, just do anything, say anything to let me know that you won't leave me.  
  
"No sleep, eh?" He says as he sits down across from me. Not exactly the words I needed, but at least he's talking to me.  
  
"Stupid Misato." I reply, taking a sip of my tea. "What the hell is she thinking, making us wake up in the middle of the night to drag her drunken ass home?" I would do anything to make a conversation between me and Shinji last as long as possible.  
  
"Heh." He chuckles. "Yeah, well when Misato's drunk, you know she doesn't do much thinking." Had I more energy in my sleep deprived body I would have laughed at his comment. "Yesterday was a school night too." He continues.  
  
I place the last piece of the omelet in my mouth as I look at the clock. School was going to start soon, and even though I would love to talk to Shinji for a while longer, I was not going to be late to school. Last time I got a tardy on my report card, Misato practically lectured me for about an hour or two. And if that wasn't enough punishment, she also declared the fact that I would have to eat her instant dinners for about a week, something that I'm not sure how I survived.  
  
"Which is why you need to hurry up." I say as I reach for my backpack. Time to put emphasis on the importance of me being on time. "If I'm late one more time because of you, you're really going to regret it, Baka-Shinji." I raise my fist to make my point clear.  
  
I know, I know. I really am trying to be nicer to him. I'm going to need lots of practice to prepare for tomorrow.  
  
Because tomorrow is New Years. And I'm going to make it a New Years to remember.  
  
----------  
  
School. Or should I say, the never ending lectures about the second impact, or at least, what NERV wants people the think happened during second impact. Really, I don't understand why I have to listen to all this misinformation. I'm already a college graduate so there's no reason for me being here… save one.  
  
Shinji.  
  
He's my reason for attending this school. It's just another excuse to spend time with him, not that I really need to be near him twenty-four hours a day. But having a few extra hours around Shinji is nice. I'm not a stalker or anything, who the hell in their right minds would stalk such a wimp? But every once in a while, I sneak glances at him during class time. Maybe it's because he gets so tired in the class or something, but when he sleeps on his desk, he has this dumb look on his face with a bit of drool coming out of his mouth. I find that cute. Right now, it looks like he's trying so hard to keep awake, shifting his head around so he doesn't fall asleep in class.  
  
Damn it, stupid Asuka. He saw me! I'm sure of it, he shifted his head in my direction and he saw me looking at him like some sort of hentai. I quickly turned my attention to another corner of the classroom, making it seem like I'm moving my looking around out of boredom. Good old Fake Coincidence Head-Shift Maneuver.  
  
It always works. Baka-Shinji never caught on that I was looking over at him on purpose. He's probably just looking around the classroom because he's bored like I was pretending to do.  
  
But just for a while, I really had hoped he was looking at me. That he was just as infatuated with me as I am with him. But that's never going to happen if I don't start changing my ways. He'll never like me the way I am; always being mean to just about the nicest guy I've ever met. So I begin to work on being nice to him. I'll talk to him, that's a sign of friendship isn't it?  
  
"You bored?" I type. I knew that he was, but I'd do anything to start a conversation with him. I wonder if he even knows its me who's typing to him, so I make sure that he knows. "Well? Reply already, Baka-Shinji." That should definitely tell him that it was me who sent the message. Well… that and I'm getting impatient and I need someone to talk to right now.  
  
"I'm surprised that you're not asleep yet." He types. Heh. He's one to talk. I've seen him last for only three minutes of the teacher's lecture and then he was out like log. One time, he even slept in class throughout the entire day, skipping lunch even.  
  
Not that I… always check up on him, but it gives me something to do during class.  
  
Anyways, back to the conversation. It takes me a few seconds to come up with a response to his comment. "I might as well be. I'm not learning anything anyways." I type. "But if I go to sleep, then I become vulnerable to you or your hentai stooges staring at my glorious body without the fear of me beating the crap out of you guys." I know that Shinji isn't a peeping hentai, but I just say that he is. It's okay to constantly call him a hentai, I'm not being mean, it's just a friendly comment. Right?  
  
"I'm not a hentai." He defends himself. I know he's not. "And who in their right mind would risk getting beaten to death by you anyways?" That hurt. Does it ever occur to him that I want people to be attracted to me, especially himself?  
  
But I'd never show any signs of weakness. "I do instill fear don't I? :-) " Do I scare Shinji? Is he so afraid of me that he can't see that I just want to be close to him?  
  
"Heh. To Kensuke maybe." He answers. "Toji, however, only obeys Hikari." I'm surprised that Shinji knew how the stooge and the class rep felt about each other. I was pretty sure that he, being one of the stooges, would be so dense as to not noticing the obvious and inevitable relationship that Toji and Hikari share with each other.  
  
"They have it in for each other so badly and they don't see it." I say. "It's kind of sad, isn't it?"  
  
"One of them should make the first move." He replies. "I bet that's exactly what both of them are hoping and waiting for the other to do. I just don't see the point in not making a move, there's no harm in doing so." His words burn in my heart as I realize that all I have been doing was exactly what he said, hoping and waiting.  
  
Should I follow his advice? Should I make my move? What if he rejects me? Rejection, it's what I've been fearing all along isn't it? After all, would Shinji even like a person who slaps him around all the time? I'll know by tomorrow.  
  
My thoughts are interrupted by another message on my laptop, one not coming from Shinji. "I completely agree." The message said. "I thought you two might have been talking to each other. You should take your own advice, Shinji." Who the hell was this? And what did he mean that Shinji should take his own advice?  
  
Shinji answers my first question with his guess. "Kensuke?"  
  
Damn that perverted otaku. He's going to pay for interrupting a private conversation between me and Shinji. "Baka!" I type. "How dare you enter our conversation, you stooge!"  
  
"He's not the only one!" Another hacker? Don't tell me it's Toji! Now I'll never continue my chat with Shinji. "So what have you two newlyweds been plotting eh?" If I wasn't so angry I would have blushed at the newlyweds statement. Now that I think about it, Shinji and I actually do act like newlyweds, not that I'll ever admit it.  
  
"Do you two stooges really want to risk getting your asses beaten today?" I threaten.  
  
"Damn, demon. It's bad enough you fantasize about spanking Shinji's ass, but now you gotta fantasize about ours too?" They replied. Damn I'm disappointed at myself for walking straight into that one. My infatuation with Shinji has been distracting me lately.  
  
Stupid stooges, Shinji better have not read that. Time to get brutal with the two jackasses. "You two better enjoy your last hours of manhood, because after class is over I'm going to jam my shoe so far in your crotch that you'll be tasting urine in your mouth whenever you pee."  
  
That ought to shut them up. I take a glance at Shinji. My heart sinks as I realize that he had already shut his laptop down and would not be conversing with me anymore. Damn, those two assholes are really going to get it after class. They're lucky they don't see me everyday or they'd see how much of a bitch I can really be.  
  
----------  
  
That was embarrassing.  
  
Have you ever tried pretending to act like your usual self to cover a hidden motive? It's harder than you think. I had just spent the last hour or two pretending to beg Misato to let me go to Kaji's New Years party. I actually don't want to go. Why would I want to spend my entire night watching Kaji and Misato make out? It's just disgusting. But just to make sure no one gets suspicious of me, I had to ask Misato if I could go anyways, even when I knew her answer was going to be "no".  
  
But that's not all the acting that I'm going to have to do tonight. Earlier, I convinced Misato to get a bottle of sake for me. I knew she would happily get one for me and Shinji so she could have the opportunity to get Shinji to drink. Tonight, it'll be just Shinji and me and the bottle of sake. Hopefully, by the end of tonight, I'll know for sure.  
  
An hour passed ever since Misato had left the building, and so far, nothing. I was on my tenth cup of sake and Shinji hasn't even touched his. He just stared at his cup with that cute dumbfounded face that he always has on. I don't think he even notices that I'm slowly inching closer to him. I think it's time to get his attention.  
  
"Shinji…" I whisper in my best drunken voice. "I want more sake!"  
  
"What?" He asks, a bit startled by the broken silence.  
  
"More! More! More!" I try my hardest to make myself sound like a little girl who had just raided a candy shop. "Sake! Sake! Sake!"  
  
"You're drunk." He nervously replies. He may be right.  
  
"No, I'm not." I fake some excessive giggles, the sake is making it easier. "You're the one that's drunk."  
  
He pauses for a while, not knowing how to reply to my wasted nature. I can see it in his eyes that his poor mind has no idea what to do. I wonder how he would react if I started brushing up on him. I think I'll find out soon.  
  
"Asuka." He says as he lowers himself to squatting position.  
  
"Yes?" I ask. It's hard to constantly force giggles out of my mouth.  
  
"I…" He starts to stutter. "I-I… uhh… that is… I…"  
  
What's he trying to say? "What?" I ask as I lean towards his face, hoping to pressure his words out of him.  
  
"I-I-I…" Come on, just say what you want! Let me know how you feel! Suddenly, he grabs the sake bottle away from my cup and turns around. "I really think you should stop drinking!"  
  
"Hmph." I scoff as I feel my heart on the verge of shattering. The only thing keeping my hope alive is the fact that the night was not over yet. "You're no fun at all." I say.  
  
I guess it was about here that I decided to teach him the meaning of "fun". I start to crawl towards him, still feigning a bit of drunkenness. His body starts to move away from mine, but I still gain on him. He must have stumbled on something because I suddenly find myself directly on top of his body, pinning him down. I begin to ask myself if it just the sake doing this, or if it was really me.  
  
I decide to take control so I can accomplish what I planned for tonight. "Do you care about me, Shinji?" I ask. I see his startled reaction. "Do you like me?"  
  
My heart leaps as he nods. But I still need confirmation. I need to be 100% sure.  
  
"Say it." I demand. "Tell me in words."  
  
"I like you Asuka, more than you can imagine. I've always cared about you; I liked you ever since we first met. That's the truth."  
  
I can't believe it. After all the abuse, after all the beating and ordering around, not only is he putting up with me but he actually likes me. I can feel my heart swelling with joy. But I force myself to keep composed until I can accomplish my final goal for tonight. Still, a smile escapes my face.  
  
"I like you too." I admit. Damn I forgot that I'm supposed to be drunk right now. "I mean, I really, REALLY, like you."  
  
The baka never notices the flaw in my act. "You really do?" he asks.  
  
"Yes, I do." I say. Time to be more aggressive, as in drunkenly aggressive. "You're mine, okay? You'll always be my Baka-Shinji forevers and evers and evers. You'd never leave me would you?" This is the it. The final moment that can change my life forever. It all depends on what Shinji says.  
  
And somewhere in my heart, I already know his answer. I think that I've always known the answer.  
  
"Of course not." He says. I can't control my expression anymore. A full blown smile appears on my teary face. "I'll never leave you." He continues. "I'll stay with you forever."  
  
"Promise me." I demand. I'm sure he will.  
  
"I promise that I'll never leave you." He says, just like I knew he would. "No matter what happens, I'll always be by your side."  
  
"Then kiss me." I whisper as I inch my face closer to his.  
  
He doesn't move. I should have known that Shinji would be too frozen to do such an act. My patience wears out as I press my lips onto his, something that I have been waiting all night to do. His lips are soft, and they grow softer as he kisses me back. At this moment I knew that I would not be separated from my Baka-Shinji for as long as I live.  
  
I feel warm now, being with him. So warm… like I'm drifting off to sleep… with my Shinji-kun…  
  
Before I fell asleep, I make a wish to let this moment last as long as possible. Because I know that tomorrow morning, I'm going to have to wake up from this dream. I'm sorry Shinji, for the selfish thing that I have to do tomorrow. I'm sorry that by tomorrow morning, this will only exist as a memory. I wish that this moment would last forever.  
  
But moments pass, it's what they do.  
  
----------  
  
My head feels painful. Not like "ow, I didn't get good sleep so my head hurts" pain, but more like "shit, I just got hit by a car" pain. It takes me awhile to realize that I've been sleeping in the living room all night. I nearly trip over an empty sake bottle that lay right in front of me. Is that my sake bottle? Damn, I really must've gotten wasted on New Years.  
  
As I take a seat on the couch, I hear someone walk into the living room. It's Baka-Shinji. I really hope I didn't do anything stupid in front of him last night. I probably did do something extremely stupid because the baka has the widest grin that I've ever seen on him right now. Damn my head hurts.  
  
"Ohayo." He says. I start clutching my head tighter, trying to keep the sooth the pain to a bearable amount.  
  
"Ohayo." I reply. I couldn't think of anything else to say due to the massive headache.  
  
"Are you feeling okay?" He asks. Sometimes the baka can be so blind.  
  
"Does it look like I'm okay, Baka-Shinji?" I lash at him. "I got a headache so big it feels like I'm turning into a stooge!" No, that is not an exaggeration. I really feel like I'm growing dumber.  
  
"Well, you did drink nearly a full bottle of Misato's sake last night. You're probably getting a hangover." He says.  
  
"Is that what I did last night?" I ask. Damn, this is frustrating.  
  
"Of course you did." He confirms. "The bottle didn't just empty itself."  
  
I can't believe I drank all of that sake. I don't think I'll ever touch alcohol again. Baka-Shinji probably took advantage of my drunkenness and did something hentai with vulnerable me. I bet he was climbing all over my body and groping my…  
  
No…  
  
I remember now. I was on top of him, staring into his eyes. And I told him everything. It was part of the plan, it was what I've been planning for the past few days. I remember I was acting drunk, and I admitted that I really liked him. And that was right after… oh mein gott…  
  
He told me he liked me too. He likes me! He promised that he'd never leave me. He promised that we would stay together forever.  
  
I feel like I'm about to burst with joy. If my head didn't hurt so much, I'd probably leap on Shinji right now and give him a Misato-sized hug. Then I remember the second part of the plan. I told myself that this was not to go any further. Trust me, going further is what I want most. To tell you the truth, I would love to be Shinji's girlfriend, and maybe something even more. I know that I would care for him as long as I live.  
  
But what if he felt different? What if somewhere along the way, he decides that I'm not enough for him? Or what if I go too far with my insults and beatings? Everything I have ever loved has been taken away from me, and if I ever lose Shinji, I wouldn't be able to stand it. So I can't allow myself to love him. I can't allow myself to love anyone.  
  
"I don't remember." I finally say. "I don't remember anything that happened last night." I'm so sorry, my sweet Shinji. Please forgive me.  
  
I can see his heart shatter. I see tears forming into his eyes. I fight to hold back my own; fighting back my tears seems harder than ever now.  
  
But I manage to keep myself together as I act as casual as I could. "I didn't do anything stupid, did I?" I ask, trying to get a response out of him. "Nothing happened, right?"  
  
It takes him a while, but he finally gives me a reply. "No, Asuka. Nothing happened." He lied, wiping his tears away and forcing a small smile on his face. Thank you, Shinji. I smile back at him. I'm glad that he didn't pressure me into going any further.  
  
"Good." I say. I put on my best normal Asuka expression. "For your sake I hope nothing hentai happened yesterday. If I find out you did something hentai to me, you're going to fear even being in the same room as me."  
  
He nods, his smile is bright now as everything returns to normal, just as it should be. I think that deep inside Shinji, a serious relationship would sound scary to him too. And we already share a relationship with each other, a different special kind of relationship. A type of relationship that allows us to be close to each other, but not enough to hurt each other. This type of relationship that we share would do for me.  
  
"Breakfast is almost ready. Want anything, Asuka?" He asks as he retreats to the kitchen. His daily normal question.  
  
"Breakfast, of course." I say my routine reply. I hope he brings some ice for me while he's at it. This is the relationship that we are comfortable with, it's truly unbreakable. And maybe, when I feel like I'm ready, we may blossom into something more. Until then, I'm content with what I have now. Because I know that he promised me that he'll never leave me.  
  
You'll stay with me forever won't you, Shinji? You promised.  
  
THE END  
  
==========  
  
Backstage Bonus: Life's Not Fair  
  
Shinji: I can't believe that Asuka's POV is longer than mine. I'm the main character of Evangelion, right? Shouldn't all fanfictions revolve around me?  
  
Toji: Actually, if you check online, you're not nearly as popular as Asuka or Rei.  
  
Shinji: What?  
  
Toji (Opening Netscape 7.1 on his laptop): See here? Both Asuka and Rei have at least dozens of shrines dedicated just to them. You've got… maybe six.  
  
Shinji (Grabbing the laptop): That can't be right, I've got more than six! Let me see!  
  
Shinji searches all throughout Google for shrines dedicated just to him, only to have found five, two of which whose links don't even work.  
  
Shinji: What about this one? "For the Love of Shinji Ikari: An official Shinji Ikari fanlisting". It's got sixty members. See? I'm a pretty popular guy.  
  
Toji (chuckling): Uhh… this site says you're a pervert. Oh, and you're also gay.  
  
Shinji: I'm not gay!  
  
Toji: The sixty members here say otherwise.  
  
Shinji (groaning): At least most of the authors on Fanfiction.net write pretty neat stuff about me.  
  
Toji: There are quite a few stories here that pair you up with Kaworu.  
  
Shinji (glowing bright red): I'm not attracted to Kaworu.  
  
Toji (laughing): Suuure… and remember that Asuka has a longer POV than you do in this fanfiction.  
  
Shinji: Shut up! Life's not fair for me, okay? I'm going to talk to the author about that.  
  
Toji: You can't right now. Asuka and Rei are still taking turns kicking him in the unmentionables. He's going to have to change his name to The Fourth Woman if this keeps up.  
  
Shinji (sighing and leaving for the door): Fine… I'll talk to him when they're done. Let's get out of here.  
  
TheForthMan (distantly crying): WHY HASN'T ANYONE CALLED 9-1-1? 


End file.
